Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
