Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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