just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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