Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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