And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
He kissed a someone with a penis
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
