The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
No more Irish car bombs ever.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
