Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
