That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
