Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
