They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
