Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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