I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Michael Bay diarrhea
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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