You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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