And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
