Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
