If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
