the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Randomize
