is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
