I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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