"it" just moved
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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