I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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