I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
