he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
