hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
sick fucks of a feather flock together
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
