Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I will be naked everywhere
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I want to be your penis for a week.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
