i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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