is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
