put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Randomize