You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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