Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
