I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
