I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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