I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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