This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Boobs are out for the taking
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
