So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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