went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
