The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
birth control should be required to get into college
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
