Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
