My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
