haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
