new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
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