very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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