did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
