I hate your face
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Randomize
