sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Randomize
