Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Ladies don't puke and tell
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
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