I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
