just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
