Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize