I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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